5/27/08

Nice, but fleeting distractions

This was a weekend full of activities. Saturday my grandparents came for a short visit. We had a great time. We did some shopping and Grandpa and I went for a short walk through the woods to spot some birds. Saturday night was the long-awaited home opener for the Southern Illinois Miners. We got to sit in a private area with unlimited food and drinks. They even had a nice fireworks display at the end. My grandparents left very early on Sunday morning.

After church, I went to lunch with the Fleming family. It was Mike's birthday and we celebrated at Mackie's Pizza in Marion (one of my favorites). After that, we all went to see Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (which, by the way, was utterly disappointing).

Immediately after the movie, I rushed home, changed clothes and headed back to Marion with Bethany to go to another Miners game. There were some fairly serious storms so we spent most the evening siting in the Box Office where Kyle works.

My Memorial Day was also very full. Most of it was Spent at the Allison's home with friends. At about 6:00pm, it was time for me to bid farewell and go home. I was the last one to leave.

The minute I walked out their door, it hit me that I would be spending another evening alone. I couldn't bare it. I picked up the keys and decided to get out of the house. I soon found myself wandering aimlessly around Wal-mart. I stood and organized the $5 movie bin. That ought to tell you something. I then came home, popped in a movie, and tried to forget about my sadness.

The presence of my dear friends and family was a lovely distraction, but I desperately ache for Kyle. This morning I sobbed as he left for work. Five minutes a day is simply not enough. Even now, I sit at work full of tears. I forgot how hard this was going to be.

How do I overcome this sadness and loneliness? I realized last week that it's okay to be sad. David was full of sorrow, yet he praised God. I praise God for his provision through Kyle's job, but I am afflicted by loneliness. No, not merely loneliness, for I have been quite occupied by other loved ones. Unfortunately, none of them could fill the void. I miss my husband.

Also, I know it could be worse. Much worse.

3 comments:

Chase Abner said...

1) This is your official invitation for you to come visit Alisha, Simon and I anytime that you're alone and willing to suffer some sub-Kyle company.

2) Also, since you're willing to pass time organizing strangers' media, then you could organize my CD collection AND be with people who love you.

3) Are you gonna finish your Proverbs 31 series?

Chelsea Bass said...

1) Thanks. I will take you up on that soon and often.
2) I will gladly do that. I really like to organize.
3) I wasn't sure that anyone remembered that. I will resume it soon.

Jim said...

Chelsea, sorry :(
I love you :)

If you are really really lonely, you can travel to Champaign and organize my CD, DVD, and Video Game collections. O and have some quality time with the Smiths