12/23/04

Goodbye, Louise Lockhart

My great-grandmother died last night. It's been crazy around here. The phone rings non-stop. It kinda puts a different spin on Christmas. She was ready to go. She had Alzheimer's disease and was suffering with a staff infection. I didn't know her that well. She disowned my mother and I years ago. Most of the memories I have of her are not good ones. Actually, after talking with other members of my family, no one seems to have many good memories of her.
I was sad when the nursing home called to say she died. Not really because she was gone, but because I don't know where she is now. As far as I know, she never accepted Christ as her Savior, and she certainly never lived a life that reflected a love for Him. I prayed that God would just allow me to intercede for her to accept him, to take control of her life. 
On a lighter note, I get to see Kyle tomorrow! I'm leaving super early to drive down to Anna. Pray that the roads will be clear and safe and that my car will be running fine.
Merry Christmas, Y'all!

12/21/04

Christmas Break

Yesterday was my first day back at work for a while. It was crazy! I came home completely stressed out! I was in a bad mood for the rest of the night. My morning didn't start much better today. However, the rest of my day was much better. God completely reminded me of how blessed I am to have a job to come to, and that I don't have to worry about money. I'm thankful my parents are able to pay for my school. I'm also thankul to have Grandparents who are so supportive.
I've figured out that being away from Kyle for even a day makes me a very grumpy girl. Then I realized that I need to get over that. It's okay to miss him, but I shouldn't let it effect the way I treat others. It's been very exciting the last few days calling him my "fiancé" when I talk about him.
I made some traditional Irish Soda Bread today. I haven't tried it yet. It's a family tradition. I think I'll go try some now.
Can't wait for Christmas!

12/19/04

Blogging and Winter

Back to blogging... Man, I'm so bad at keeping up with these things. I forgot I even had a blog until I read a friend's. Then I had the sudden desire to start writing in it again.
You want to know one thing I hate about winter? It completely takes away my ability to consume ice cream. I love ice cream and all it's sweet goodness. But central Illinois winter is just too cold. I can't handle it. I have a hard enough time defrosting after I come inside. I really want some mint chocolate chip right now.

I heard this woman the other day badmouthing her daughter-in-laws. She didn't have one nice thing to say about them to me. It was really sad. It made me start to worry. I love Kyle's mom. She's really great. His whole family is. But what if she said things like that about me behind my back the way this woman did? That would be terrible. I hope that I don't have to spend the rest of my life living up to the kind of trivial expectations this woman had, or to have someone talking behind my back about what I should be doing to raise my kids better. Something tells me I won't have to. Kyle's mom has more class than that. I hope that if she had a problem with me, she would say something, rather than badmouth me to everyone else in the family, or tell all her friends what a bad wife and mother I am. It was quite crappy of this other woman to do that. Whether she was right or wrong about what she said, it was overruled by the fact that she was wrong for saying it to me. I'm learning more about the kind of mother-in-law I want to be to my future childrens' future spouses.
Wow. Those were two completely random topics...
Song in my head: O Come All Ye Faithful

4/17/04

Mom's Weekend

Thanks for all the prayers. Man, my mood has improved tremendously!
This weekend was Mom's Weekend here at the beautiful University of Illinois. The moms started pouring in last night. Oh man, was it hilarious! The streets were packed with these crazy people driving (who obviously weren't used to driving on this campus) The sidewalks were packed with moms dressed up with their sons and daughters heading to the bars. Some of the things these moms were wearing... forty five year old Britney Spears... Walking by Joe's, the place was completely packed with mother/daughter duos. The sign outside read "Welcome Moms- 6$ Pitchers of Coors Light!" I can't even imagine going out with my mom like that! Can you? Maybe some of you did... that sounds crazy to me!

4/16/04

First Entry

My first every entry... Hmm... maybe this will become like a new journal for me. I will certainly be surprised if anyone reads it. You know, who could really write anything too personal in something like this? I am not as witty as my dear friend, Amy, who cracks me up in her hilarious blogs. She's always telling stories of these strange things happening to her. Hmm... maybe I will become wittier... is that a word? Anyway, we'll see how this goes. I'm not very good at keeping up with these things. However, if you read this, I want you to say to me, "I like fish bowls." That way I will know that you read my entry and I will feel loved.
Lately I've been getting very easily frustrated over silly little things that are completely out of my control. I am hoping that this will be therapeutic. I think it already is... End of semester is upon us, and stress levels are rising. The last few days I've seen less and less of Kyle. I think that's the largest frustration. He is therapeutic. When I don't get to see him as often as I would like, I get cranky. Maybe I shouldn't be that way... I don't really know. I do know that this will pass as soon as my schedule opens up a little more. In the mean time, I will be praying for patience and understanding.